Driven, 2013

I told Catherine that what interests me the most about the sport of bodybuilding, figure and physique sports is the question “why?”

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Pick up any muscle magazine or fitness magazine and you will find a publication full of “how” information.  There is no exploration at all of the Psyche or personality that provides the will and the drive to do what is needed in order to compete at a high level and to bring the body and the look that is needed.

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What makes a beautiful and very, very fit woman want to put themselves through the inconvenient, strenuous and, in some wrongheaded cases, unhealthy regime needed to shed that last bit of fat or build that last ounce of muscle.

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This question interests me not to attack the athletes or sport in any way! It interests me because I have always been interested in human behavior and what drives it… and I believe that it should be the first obvious question and the most important one asked, not only by a person viewing the sport of bodybuilding, but one participating.

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I have seen the tremendous anxiety felt by those who believe their body is not as they would like it.  I have seen “jacked” men curse and throw things in disgust and women who could walk a five mile public beach in a bikini never seeing anyone even close to as fine as they are weep because they felt their body was not good enough!  This is very different than an intellectual admission that they could have done something better, but genuine anxiety.  Its more than just not doing as well as they like at the sport because it involves the image they have of who the are.  Why?  I feel that coming to an understanding of the psychological processes involved in where this comes from could greatly help combat these kinds of negative feelings.

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Would this make one a better athlete?… or encourage them to take the sport more seriously, or less?  Could one enjoy the sport more if they understood their “why”… Would they be a happier, better person?  Could it even make the strenuous training and strict diet easier?

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I started this blog mostly to be able to write a little bit about the photographs that I make in order to explore my “why”.  I know what kind of photographs I make and I also know how I make them.  What I do not know is “why”!  And I, somehow, believe that is the most important answer to find.  That is what art is about… bodybuildng, painting or photography… What are we trying to communicate about ourselves through our efforts??   I believe that everyone that has a passion has it for themselves.   I believe that it is an interesting exercise to ask “why?”

Corn Field


I have written before, I believe, about the anxiety before a shoot with a client or a new model.  It is obvious to me that it is no longer the technical that causes me any kind of stress, but the creative… how I want this to look (capturing the shooting end of it…. the post production is easy)…what I want to say….But I think it comes down to what I can control the least…which when shooting “street” is almost always the location.   By “street” I mean a public location….maybe a park or maybe just on a public street… or sometimes a place where I am not really supposed to be.   This is most surely not studio shooting and there is always a certain lack of control.  Sometimes I think I make things hard for myself by always thinking complicated.  This corn field shot should remind that I don’t always need a crazy, complicated location in order to make a fairly cool picture.